How to Coach a Teen to Drive Safely

Image courtesy of
FreeDigitalPhotos.net and pakorn
Our youngest turned 16 this year and before too long, she’ll be driving.  We already have a used car parked in our driveway that will be getting a tune up, new tires and a full inspection.  We didn’t pay much for it and I wouldn’t trust it on long trips, but it will become her transportation to get her to school and to work and back.  And each day she leaves the driveway, my wife and I will cross our fingers and say a few prayers, even though she has older brothers who set out on this same journey ahead of her.

 One reason for our parental worry is what we learned from a
Reid Hollister
recent guest who appeared on my parenting television show at the Enfield Cox studios.  Tim Hollister of Connecticut lost his 17-year-old son Reid in a driving accident in 2006.  Since that tragic incident, Mr. Hollister wrote the book “Not So Fast: Parenting Your Teen Through the Dangers of Driving.”  Visit Mr. Hollister’s Website, http://www.FromReidsDad.org.
Tim Hollister
As the national authority and spokesperson for safer teen driving, Tim Hollister will tell you that he thought he had everything covered as far as training and coaching his son when it came to driving skills.  The two most important things that Tim shared with me in the interview: avoid allowing your teen to take passengers and discourage joyriding.  The reason is that in the first year of your teen’s driving experience, driving without intention and for just the joy of driving around increases the dangers to your teen.  In his book, he offers parents the following tips for coaching your teen through the first few years of driving:


DON’T BE BLIND TO THE DANGERS
All too often, parents find it difficult to accept the fact that their teen could be at risk.  They suffer from the ‘halo effect’ in a sense and believe that, “It couldn’t happen to my child, she’s a very safe driver.”  Keep your child safe by accepting that the dangers exist and establish rules and boundaries around the privilege of driving.

 ENGAGE EVERY TIME YOUR TEEN DRIVES AWAY
Mr. Hollister advises parents to know where their teen is headed, what route he is taking, the current traffic and weather conditions, his mental state, the return trip, if there are passengers, and more.  It’s a fact that teenagers do not have the cognitive capacity to take all of these preparations into consideration, but the parent does.

 THE TEEN DRIVING AGREEMENT

Every parent should draft an agreement that clearly states the dangers, and lists rules and consequences of the violation of those rules.  But its primary purpose is to initiate calm and productive conversations about driving, conduct and expectations.  It should also be signed and reviewed regularly to keep the important content in the forefront of the teen’s conscious thinking.  



Comments

  1. Sabrina CraigMay 22, 2015 at 5:22 PM

    It's hard not to worry when you, yourself, have personally met someone who was a victim of a road accident. I'm sure your daughter is not that reckless, but then again, there is no way of telling how a day will go. At any rate, there are ways to lessen the risks, and that book definitely checks out on how to coach teens on driving safely. Thanks for sharing that, Bill! All the best to you! :)

    Sabrina Craig @ Medical Attorney NY

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Why Love and Logic has it Wrong... Again!

Image
Children don’t often demonstrate respect because they either don’t know what it looks like or, as the Father of Individual Psychology, Alfred Adler taught us, their disrespectful behavior is their way of attempting to get unmet needs satisfied.  The secret to getting kids to treat their parents and others with respect is to first treat them with respect and to then help them find their place in the family or the classroom.  But the creators of the LOVE AND LOGIC parenting program would have you believe differently.  All parenting programs are not created equal and in my opinion, many are misguided and offer parents and teachers bad information.  It is my belief that we should not just be demanding and manipulating our kids to be more cooperative, we should be raising children who WANT to cooperate and be engaged in the family or classroom because they feel encouraged to do so. One of those programs that frequently offers misguided information and gimmicks is the Love and Lo
Read more

DAY 14: COMPOSE A POEM FOR YOUR CHILD

Image
14 DAYS OF TIPS FOR DEMONSTRATING LOVE TO YOUR CHILD DAY 14: COMPOSE A POEM FOR YOUR CHILD – Compose a poem about your child or describing how much you love her. Print if off on special preprinted paper with a border that can be purchased at office supply stores. Frame it and hang it on your child’s bedroom wall. You could even include the child’s picture or her foot or handprints if you had them done earlier. Sign it and read it to her nightly.
Read more

Why Some Parents Spank

Image
This is for all the parents who set out NOT to spank their children, but end up doing it anyway; you are NOT bad parents, sometimes you just don’t know what else to do.  I believe you may get frustrated to the point of using it to gain the child’s attention or as an attempt to stop challenging behaviors immediately.  I can say that I've been in your shoes!  I raised 3 children of my own and often felt myself get to the point of having the urge to spank.  So I feel for parents and know how hard it is when our children push our patience to the upper limits. (Photograph courtesy of David Castillo Dominici and freedigitalphotos.net) I was the oldest of eight children and took notice of my parent’s anger and how it would provoke them to the point of spanking, and they did.  I remember having the sense that one or both of them would be bothered by something outside of my control and then I would do something that kids do and it would push them to their breaking point.  I would g
Read more